Title: Tinsel Parade
Author: Jemma Rhodes
Email: jemme_ring@yahoo.co.uk
Rating: G
Category: Christmas 2002 Challenge
o Start with the dialog 'What do you mean that's not allowed?'
o Contain no mention of Regulations
o Contain lots of tinsel
o Have Jonas as a member of SG1 (though Daniel can certainly make an appearance
o Have a Sam and Jack kiss
Summary: Two of SG1 are partners in crime with a plan to celebrate Christmas
Sam's Note: Jemma wrote this for me for Christmas. But all good things should be shared so I thought I'd put this up. ;) I know it's a little late (sorry).

***

"What do you mean that's not allowed?" Jonas asked in disbelief.
"I'm sorry Mr. Quinn. It's a matter of safety." The General replied gravely.
"You're telling me we can't decorate any of the base? At all?"
"I'm afraid so."
Standing up, Jonas moved towards the door. "Thank you for your time, Sir!"
He left, in search of his partner in crime.

*

"Hey Carter!"
"Hey Sir." Sam replied whilst looking up from her latest doo-hickey.
Jack walked all the way into her lab and took a seat opposite her.
"What'ya doin'?" He asked innocently.
"Just working on a…project…Sir." She said reluctantly, immediately arousing his suspicions.
He leaned forward slightly and asked again. "Carter? What are you up to?"
Sam blushed furiously at the slight innuendo in his voice, deciding then that it might be kinda cool to let him in on the secret.
Standing up she walked around to his side of the workbench. "Promise you won't tell anyone." She stressed whilst facing him.
He smiled up at her conspicuously and agreed. "Not a problem."
"Okay."
Turning from him to the rather strange looking device she began to press a number of buttons on its steel surface.
"Carter, patience is not my virtue." Jack said impatiently.
She nodded furiously and then was done. "Okay Sir, stand back."
He did as he was told, getting up from his chair and moving to stand by the wall.
Sam pushed a few more buttons on the device, and then stepped back quickly to join Jack by the wall.
You know Sir, the machine hasn't actually been analysed or tested yet."
"We're testing it right now Carter!"
"I know that Sir, but what I', trying to say is that I have no idea if it's going to work properly."
He looked at her with a worried expression. "Carter? What does it do?" he asked nervously.
"Watch." She replied, turning back to face the device which was now making a considerable amount of noise and giving off quite a lot of steam.
All of a sudden, something long, shiny, colourful and slinky came out of one end of the machine.
Jack's jaw fell down as realisation dawned.
"Carter!" He exclaimed. "You made a tinsel making machine?!"
She turned to face him, her face alight with a smile.
"Yes Sir!" She replied happily.
"You're incredible."
Sam blushed furiously and dipped her head slightly.
"Hey." He chided. "Don't do that. You are."
Lifting her head back up with a finger under her chin he saw that she was smiling more than he'd seen for the past year.
"Thank you." She whispered back.
Suddenly the moment was broken by the loud sound of whirring, a rather unpleasant smell and *a lot* of smoke gradually filling the room.
All this was followed by "Oh my God!" coming from the door way to her lab.
Both of them turned, straining to see through the smoke.
"Sam! What's going on?"
It was Jonas.
Partner in crime.
"Jonas! The machine is out of control!"
"I can see that!" Came the frantic reply. "Have you looked outside in the corridor?"
Sam and Jack looked back at each other, and then quickly walked to the door where Jonas was standing, and then looked into the corridor.
"Oh my God!" They both said in unison.
Looking back into the lab they saw the cause of the problem.
Coming out of the machine, snaking it's way across the floor of Sam's lab, out the door and down the corridor in both directions, was tinsel.
Red, blue, green, yellow, purple, orange, silver, all the colours mixed together, glitter, the variations were endless.
"Sam! The General didn't approve the plan!"
"What? You're kidding right?"
"No! What are we gonna do?"
"Carter!"
Jack caught her attention with a yell. "What the hell is going on?"
"Well in short Sir, Jonas and I wanted to decorate the SGC this Christmas and I thought it would be fun to see if I could build a tinsel making machine. Jonas was going to get the General's permission, but obviously he failed. Now we're stuck with hundreds of pieces of tinsel and no where to put them!"
Sam was out of breath by the time she had finished.
Jonas was looking more and more worried.
And Jack was…smiling.
"What are you smiling at?" Sam asked him incredulously.
He smiled even more at that as he remembered her speaking those words a few years earlier after *that* kiss.
"I have a plan.

*
~3 hours later~

"Colonel! I can't believe we did it!" Sam beamed at him.
Jonas was displaying all of his pearly whites in happiness.
"Believe it Carter."
"Colonel, how did you convince the General to let us do this? Jonas asked.
"I just convinced him that having decorations here didn't pose any safety threats and that we could all do with some Christmas cheer."
Just then Teal'c entered the commissary. He stopped just inside the door and looked around the room in amazement. What he saw puzzled him slightly. There was a Christmas tree in the corner of the room, covered in multicoloured tinsel. From the ceiling he saw hundreds of pieces of tinsel pinned up in arches, with mistletoe hanging from them.
However the most noticeable change to the room would have to be the walls/ Instead of the usual grey, all the walls were covered by strands of tinsel. There wasn't a single piece of grey to be seen.
With an eyebrow raised, Teal'c looked to his friends.
"What has transpired here?"
"Well," Jack started. "Christmas exploded, Teal'c."
"I see."
Jack, Jonas and Sam all started laughing. Teal'c refrained from further comment and went to pick up his lunch.
Once the laughter had died down Jack spoke.
"Hey Carter?"
"Yes Sir?"
"Look up."
Sam did as she was told, but almost immediately looked down again, blushing.
Jack merely smiled at her, stepping forward he leaned down and pressed his lips against her.
Through the haze they vaguely heard Jonas coughing and hurriedly excusing himself.
After a few minutes the kiss drew to a natural end.
Resting her forehead against his Sam spoke.
"God bless mistletoe!"
Jack stood straight and shook his head in disagreement.
"No Sam," He began. "God bless you and your tinsel making machine!"

*
The End